My My What An Awful Mess...

I'm pretty tired right now. This heat makes me so sleepy.

Today was a pretty nice day. I picked Joy up from school and we hung out at my house. I watched Palo Alto while she napped. I've been wanting to see that movie for so long. It was really good and just what I expected it to be like. I want to see it again.

I got along with my parents pretty well today. I liked it. They're talking about getting part time jobs for the weekends. I wish my parents didn't have to work so much.

I'm going to the Bay Area tomorrow to help my sister and brother-in-law move. I didn't really want to but if I go tomorrow I won't have to help them on Saturday and miss Joy's graduation.

I met Joy's mom and brother today. I was so nervous. Apparently they thought I was nice. They were both nice too. I'm excited because Joy said I could probably go over her place now. That'd be pretty cool.

House of Leaves is such a crazy novel. I really like the book though. I'm probably going to try and read a few chapters before going to sleep.

Tonight Joy and I hung out at this park we always go to. The weather was so nice I just felt like being outside.

I can't get enough of this song for some reason.

We Will Never Have Our Old Way, We Will Never Have A Right Away

Today was so fun. I picked Joy up from school and after we went to the mall to buy her a dress, we went to Arts and hung out. There were water balloons and such so I left a pretty wet guy.

I just watched this really weird movie called Nowhere. I don't think I've ever seen such a weird, dumb movie.

It's 2 a.m. and I feel like I should be out and about. That's probably not good.

Moose for some reason really wants to lay with me. Damn dog. It's too hot.

This made me laugh.

Yesterday we were looking at old pictures of us from a few years ago. It's crazy how much people have changed. Our numbers have definitely gotten smaller too. I'm grateful to have who I do though. They're the ones who matter.

It's strange how my life is turning out to be completely different than what I thought it would be like at this point. I like it.

I Can Say I'd Love To Live This Life Just To Be With You

I just woke up really tired. I felt weird last night. I don't know why. It freaked me out a little.

I'm waiting for Joy to get out of school to hang out with her. It's so weird how when I'm with her I'm automatically in a great mood. She really is amazing. It's weird how I'm growing up and I'm realizing I have to be more responsible and what not. I see my sisters with their boyfriends and how they do things like work and pay bills but still have them over or something (except for my sister who's married and already lives with her other half). I can picture myself doing those things with Joy and being happy. I'm going to do whatever I can to make it happen.

I've been hanging out with Art and Kady and Anthony and Brooke a lot. It's nice being around them more.

I miss Sacramento a little bit. Being home is weird.

I meet Joy's parents on Saturday. I'm really nervous. Hopefully they'll like me. I don't want them to think I'm dumb or something.

I want Joy to come to my sister's wedding this year but the only thing is she would have to have her own room in the hotel we're staying at. Maybe I'll just pay for it. I really want her to be there with me.

I need to hurry up and apply to a few places for the summer. I'm going to try and work some other places instead of JC Penney. If I have to though, I'll see if I can get my job back. I can't just sit at home all summer.

Joy and I saw Star Trek on Sunday. It was really cool. I liked it a lot. I want to see the new Terminator, Up, Angels and Demons, and that one movie with Michael Cera (whenever it comes out). Maybe we'll start going to the theater in Manteca. I hear that one is better.

I've been writing this new song I have. It's coming out pretty good.

I need to get ready to pick Joy up.

I Can See You From Across The Room, There's A Tear In Your Storied Eye

In the last 4 days or so I've had about 5 hours of sleep each night. I feel like shit.

Today was nice though. I woke up and went to the Bay Area with my dad. I hung out with my sister and brother-in-law. My sister's stomach's getting huge. I can't wait for her to give birth to the little guy, even if he's a jerk who won't kick when I'm actually paying attention.

I went to a concert with them tonight. It was actually a Jane's Addiction/Nine Inch Nails concert. I definitely wouldn't have gone to that if they didn't ask. I figured it'd be nice to spend time with them though and it was actually kind of cool. It was definitely fun.

I wonder if I'll act the way people did at the concert for the bands I like now when I see them in like 10 years. Weird to think about.

Moose is laying next to me and we're watching the Louis C.K. special. I can actually tell he missed me. I love that damn dog.

Leaving the dorms last night was pretty weird. There were so many memories there. I'm definitely going to miss Pad and Drew during the summer.

I was so happy to see Joy last night. The summer is going to be amazing because I'll be with her all of the time. I'm happy my family likes her too, because that means she can be over a lot and come to family gatherings and what not.

Last night I stayed up and for some reason had a really good writing session. I started writing the first verse and chorus for a new song. I really like it a lot. I want to start writing more and I want to record more often.

Tomorrow I have to get my tire fixed for my car, put the tire on my car, mow the lawn, pick Joy up from Saturday school, get sushi with her, possibly take her to work, figure out what I'm going to wear to Brooke's party, pick Joy up from work, then go to Brooke's party. Definitely a busy day. I'll probably have to take Moose to the park somewhere in there too.

Goddamn I need sleep.

We Never Change, Do We? We Never Learn, Do We?

Coldplay's album Parachutes will always be one of my favorite albums.

"My heart is yours.
It's you that I hold on to.
That's what I'll do.
But I know I was wrong,
And I won't let you down."

"As my head just aches
When I think of
The things that I shouldn't have done

But, life is for living
We all know
And I don't wanna live it alone"



So good.

We'll Write Out In The Sand Here Lies The Destiny Of Two Hurt Souls Afraid To Be Cured Again

I'm studying for two finals I have tomorrow. U.S. History and my Math class. They're back to back with about a 15 minute break between each. Awesome.

I'll be so happy after I'm done with those two exams. I think I did pretty good on my last two exams, and it would be awesome if I did good on these two also.

I'm going home tomorrow too, so that's pretty exciting. It's weird though. The dorms were such an important part of my life this last year. It's really strange that Pad, Drew, and I aren't going to be hanging out everyday. Drew's leaving tomorrow morning. I really wish I could have hung out and spent time with him tonight before he left, but I really need to study. I'm sure he understands. Next year is going to be awesome with our house. Those two are seriously my best friends.

I was talking to Drew about how different the whole dorm experience was than what we expected. In the beginning I hated it so much. I wanted to go home every weekend. I knew no one. Now I've been busy almost all of the time, have great friends, and know more people. I love it. I honestly like my life here in Sacramento.

I can't wait to go home either though. It's going to be so great to be able to hang with Joy and Art and Anthony and Kady and all of them all the time. It's awesome having good friends in Tracy and here.

I just want this week to be over with.

5 hour energy shot, you're looking very tempting right now.

I'll Be Counting Up My Demons, Hoping Everything's Not Lost

I'm still up working on my study guide for my final tomorrow. We probably should have worked on this earlier. Fuck.

I started listening to Just Surrender today for the first time in so long. They're so good.

I thought this was so funny for some reason.


I have a few terms to work on but I'm going to finish them in the morning. I want to at least get a bit of sleep before my final.

I'm so excited for this week to be over with. I can tell this summer is going to be great.

Coldplay is amazing. I can't wait to see them in July with Joy and my sister and brother-in-law. The first time I saw them they were so good.

I hope they play this song.

Everything's Fine For Just One Night

I have finals this week. It's definitely going to be a stressful week.

This last week has been ridiculous. I think I need to give my liver a break.

It's pretty gross that such old guys would hang out with high school girls. Like seriously it's creepy. Especially if it involves swimming in bathing suits and beaches. Fucking creeps.

Yesterday was fun. A few moments where it wasn't, but overall it was good.

I can't wait to be home next week. It's going to be great.

The heat was so crazy yesterday.

I'm so hungry. I'm waiting for us to go get food somewhere.

I've been feeling weird lately. I don't know what it is. Again.

I'm so unmotivated lately.

I was Fifteen, On Top Of The World, I Was Fifteen, And You Were My Girl

I'm up right now typing a paper that's due tomorrow. It's a book report for a book I didn't read. I actually think I'm going to do well on it though. I don't really mind the whole not sleeping thing.

I've been eating what I can the last few days. I head back to Tracy for the weekend tomorrow, so I'm definitely looking forward to my mom's cooking.

I'm actually really excited for this weekend. I don't know what it is. Anthony, Art, and Joy are getting me tomorrow. I can't wait. I think I might have made too many plans this weekend though. It's weird because every other time I've gone to Tracy, people never really made an effort to hang out. Oh well. I'm going to try and do my best to hang out with everyone at some point.

We were looking at houses online around here. There are a few good ones. Our friend Carl was thinking about moving in with us but I guess that's not for sure yet. Honestly I think it'd be better if it was just Padraic, Drew, Joy, and I. We can still get a four bedroom house because Joy and I want our own rooms. I told my mom about it today and she surprisingly was completely fine with the idea. I really thought she was going to disown me for living with my girlfriend. So that's cool.

Tonight's episode of Scrubs was so sad. I honestly am upset that it's over. I mean in a way I'm glad they stopped before they got ridiculous and turned to a piece of crap, but it still sucks that they're done. The scene where J.D. is watching his future on that screen or whatever was amazing. It seriously like moved me. I don't know. I can't believe it's over. I feel like I lost a friend or something. I'm definitely going to miss it.

The band Man Overboard is seriously really good. Their CD is up for download on their page, which is really cool of them.

From the looks of it, all of my finals are going to be easier than my midterms. Awesome.

I've been thinking about how I'm still bitter about certain things from my past. I don't know why. It's stupid, but it doesn't change the fact that I am. I think there are a few things that will always be with me. It kind of sucks to think about, but maybe they'll make me a better person. I really want to be a better person.

I watched the new X-Men movie in Sonora last weekend. It was so good. There are a lot of movies I can't wait to watch.

There's this Christmas song by Man Overboard that I can't stop listening to. It's so good. It's weird how I didn't hear this song around Christmas. Especially since I had the CD and it was on my itunes.

I've missed my family a lot. I've missed my girlfriend a lot. I've missed my dog a lot. I've missed my friends a lot. Tomorrow couldn't get here sooner.

Im in my history class, waiting for it to start. My ipod decided to die without warning. I woke up this morning freezing because of the damn air conditioning. Definitely an awesome day. But i just ate which put me in a better mood. Last night i seriously ate poptarts for dinner. I cant wait to be home.

Drowned By The Screams Of Decadence, A Call To Arms

So we're in Sonora for the weekend. Last night was alright. Nothing too exciting. Just drank and hung out I guess. Hopefully tonight is more fun.

I'm the only one awake because Drew and Pad like to sleep in until 1 in the afternoon.

I can't wait to go to Tracy next weekend. I miss a lot of stuff there.

I can't wait to cut my hair. It's getting ridiculous.

It's weird how Sonora is similar to Tracy, drama-wise.

I wish Summer was here already. It's usually my favorite time of year, despite of the bad things that happen during it.

I started writing a new song. I like it so far. Lyrics need to be easier to write.

The season finale of Heroes was alright. It could have been better for sure. Sylar better come back. Why didn't they put Claire's blood in Nathan's body? If Matt could do that to Sylar, why didn't they just make him a good guy? So many questions unanswered.

I definitely need to start working out soon.