Saturday, June 27, 2009

You Ain't Nothing Like The Girl I Used To Know

It's been a while.

I've been busy working. I haven't really had a lot of free time. Except when I hang out with Joy. But any other time I'm not spending at work, I'm doing some sort of chore or something of the sort.

I just got home not too long ago from Joy's. I was falling asleep while watching Disturbia. Now I can't sleep when I'm actually in my own bed. Lame.

I kind of wish I was going to Warped Tour tomorrow, but at the same time I'm fine with not going. I think I'm going in August or something. We'll see.

I just want to finish my stupid cover so I can put it up and record an original song.

I'm freaking out because I've been spending way too much money. I hate it. I just want to stop. I'm trying to eat at home more and I'm trying to hold off on buying some stuff that I can use.

I dropped my new phone today for the first time. I can already see it getting really messed up during the time I have it.

House of Leaves. Favorite book hands down. I'm not done yet. Almost.

"I have nothing left," Navidson says slowly into the microcassette recorder. "No more food. No more water. [Long pause] I have film but the flash is dead. I'm so cold. My feet hurt." Then (who knows how much later): "I'm no longer sitting on anything. The slab, whatever it was, is gone. I'm floating or falling or I don't know what." Now, except for when Navidson speaks, silence predominates.

"I have no sense of anything other than myself," he mumbles.

"I know I'm falling and will soon slam into the bottom. I feel it, rushing up at me." But he can only live with this fear for so long before he recognizes: "I won't even know when I finally do hit. I'll be dead before I can realize anything's happened. So there is no bottom. It does not exixt for me. Only my end exists." And then in a whisper: "Maybe that is the something here. The only thing here. My end."

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